We continue the Spirit of Christmas series today with my guest, Tim Gallen. Tim and I connected through an online writer’s group. His wit and humor make his work enjoyable to read. His lighthearted nature and uplifting spirit are qualities I admire. Enjoy Tim’s personal Christmas story!
Growing up, Christmas was like a Cold War battle of escalation.
Every year in the Gallen household, Jesus’ birthday became a war zone of ever-more presents, ever-more balls of wrapping paper, ever-more clothing, toys, trinkets, and stocking stuffers.
Between my three siblings and me, the tree would be jam-packed with boxes and parcels and gifts. Most years, the tree could not contain the sheer volume of gifts, with some even spilling into another part of the house.
If there was a hot toy that year — hot toy, gadget, trinket, whatever — without a doubt, come Christmas morning, we found it lying beneath the tree, decorated in colorful, festive paper that would be ripped away a few short hours later.
Honestly, I cannot recall a Christmas when I did not get everything I wanted or asked for.
But a funny thing happens when you get everything you want.
You become restless.
At least, I did and I have. It wasn’t immediately obvious. Like most of life’s meaningful lessons, it was subtle, like a pot slowly warming on a stove. But in the past few years, various bouts of anxiety, depression, and navel-gazing have led me to remember:
We are not our stuff.
It is the great tragedy of our modern world that we spend our lives attempting in vain to find purpose and meaning in our weary lives by accumulating and compiling things. I know it is a bit cliche, but we continue to seek to derive our life’s meaning from the stuff we own.
We insist on fixing our brokenness by surrounding ourselves with trinkets and toys.
This tragic truth is most evident at this time of year. Christmastime, a season of anticipation and great love and joy, has become one of constant stress and anxiety over everything from finding the perfect gift to baking cookies to grabbing the best tree.
But in the end, despite the constant filling in, despite the stress and running around, despite the compliments we receive about our Christmas cookies or decorations or gifts, our souls and spirits often remain empty once we take down the decorations and put away the gifts. We remain restless.
I have found, however, that the key to breaking this fruitless cycle is simply to lean in and embrace the truth that I am broken and imperfect.
“I am imperfect and I am enough.” — Brene Brown
We are not perfect creatures. Then again, we are, I suppose. But not in the way we traditionally think of perfection. Rather, we are perfectly imperfect — broken but beautiful in our humanity. And no toy or trinket will ever change that.
There is a peace that overwhelms us when we embrace our imperfection instead of listening to the lies of the world that only after we purchase this or own that will we be filled and content and happy. A peace only Jesus provides and offers.
In a classically human way, Jesus’ birthday celebration has morphed into the very activity He came to save us from.
After all, he’s the one who calls to “all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).
Please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not trying to be a Grinch or suck the joy and anticipation and excitement out of the season. Christmas is one of my favorite times of year and, hey — who doesn’t love receiving presents?
I do not believe the possession of material things is inherently evil or wrong. But our lives ought not be defined by the things we own.
Nothing outside of ourselves is required to validate our existence. Nothing beyond ourselves is required to give us meaning.
We are imperfect. And we are enough.
Tim Gallen is a writer and oddball who lives in Phoenix. He writes fiction and the occasional funny blog post at TimGallen.com. He and his wife put up their Christmas tree three days before Thanksgiving. Friend him on Facebook or follow him on Twitter.
Thanks for the powerful reminder of the true meaning of Christmas. In our imperfection we see the radical truth that when we are weak we are strong.
thanks, daddy-o! if you and mom hadn’t bought me all those toys over the years i never would have learned my lesson.
Such a beautiful, heartfelt post. I grew up also getting just about everything I ever wanted. As I got older, I started to realize something was missing. It was family. For the past few years I have received very few presents from my in-laws and my husband. And I’ve been okay with that. I’d rather enjoy the time I have with them; eating, drinking, laughing, and even rolling my eyes at my mother-in-law’s antics, than getting a pile of presents under the tree. The memories are what matters, not the presents.
that’s so cool, kim! i definitely still get and enjoy receiving presents, but every year i look forward more to the experience of the season and spending time with family in that special way only christmas allows. as you say, in the end, all we have are the memories, which will last longer than the random pieces of plastic we receive over the years.
Great post, Tim. I love your comment that Jesus’ birthday has morphed into the very thing he came to save us from. It is so true how we substitute activity for meaning. Thanks for sharing your thoughts. And enjoy every last present you get!
thanks so much for the comment, maria. yes, i love my irony, especially when it comes to jesus and how we humans still mess things up even with good intentions.
i will most assuredly enjoy the gifts i receive. and speaking of gifts — my brother has your harbor shores hoodie. he should be contacting you soon, i hope, to meet and give it to you. thanks for your kind words and support.
Yes, ironically, getting lots of stuff makes us restless and makes us want more stuff. Funny how that works. THere is never enough stuff. And it’s that old quote by whom? Is it Augustine who said that our hearts are restless until they find their rest in Him (and then He takes care of all the rest). I enjoyed your post. I love presents, too, but I wish there were a way to extricate them from Christmas Day itself…..maybe Boxing Day, like the British, or gift-giving on Epiphany–or something. One year, my family and I did that and we really enjoyed it. I’m hoping to re-introduce the custom, reserving Christmas Day for celebrating Jesus. But there does come a point (as I think you are implying) when enough really is enough,
Blessings,
Lynn Morrissey
lynn, i can’t agree more on implementing boxing day here in the states. i am a huge fan of the spirit of that day the brits have.
i’m not inherently opposed to gifts but there is something more fulfilling when we separate our celebration of jesus’ birth and arrival in our lives from giving gifts.
thanks so much for reading and sharing your comment!
Thankful you shared this post. Needed to be said. Spot on. “We are imperfect and we are enough.”