I didn’t choose a One Word for this new year. I didn’t make any resolutions. I haven’t set any goals. Instead, I’ve decided to take the “Whatever happens, happens” approach to this year.

I’ve spent the past few years trying to intentionally live out words that had deep significance to me. I’ve set goals and tried every way I knew to meet them. I’ve set high expectations (for myself and others) and experienced too much disappointment. I’ve dreamed big dreams and failed miserably.

I can’t do any of it anymore.

I can’t think in year-long terms. By doing so, I set myself up for failure.

So this is the year in which I’m saying…

Whatever.

If I ever get the chance to sing again, I’ll be over-the-moon. And if I don’t, I suppose I’ll eventually settle into being okay with that. As with most other types of emptiness, something else will come along to fill the holes with the passage of time.

If I start writing that book I keep thinking about, I’ll figure out the process along the way. And if I don’t, it won’t be the end of the world.

If I get involved in church again, great. And If I don’t, life will keep trucking along pretty much the same as it is now.

If relationships are reconciled, I will be ecstatic. And if not, I won’t lose anymore tears or sleep or peace over them.

I don’t mean to sound as if I don’t care what happens this year. I do. But I can’t care too much because caring too much has broken my heart in recent years. My heart needs a break this year. It needs to mend from all the disappointment and rejection and failure and broken dreams. I don’t need to add to that already-devastating list.

So I think (I hope) I’m being honest with you and with myself when I say I’ll be okay with whatever happens.